How to feel like you’re screwing everything up

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So, basically I think I’m a giant screw up. The one thing I seem to be good at is writing, the problem being when everything else is falling down around me I can’t focus on my work. Either that or I go completely the opposite direction and throw myself into work to the point of exhaustion. This last week I have cut back on smaller projects and focused on my main clients; the ones I enjoy working for and who, you know, pay me enough to keep me in tea and toast. And other necessities such as Primark dresses.

Life is tough, boys and girls and emotional drama seems to spring up out of the woodwork when you least need it. Me, I’m a master at the art of distraction, of pulling my mind away from where it should be and ignoring what’s going on around me. And I have to say, I’m rather proud of how well I do it. It’s when I come back to reality with an almighty thump that I’m forced to dust myself off and realise the problems are still there.

Apple crumble and custard is filling a hole in my heart that’s been caused by only one thing. The boy I love. Reading, writing, and sugar; you’re the only remedies to fix my suffering heart whilst I try to figure out exactly where my life is headed.

I just wish it wasn’t all so damn complicated sometimes, know what I mean?

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4 thoughts on “How to feel like you’re screwing everything up

  1. I know all too well how life can slam you when you need to be focused. I’m graduating in March with my MFA, working on my book, and damn! So many fires are raging I can’t even begin to put them out….

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